Midweek Confessions

Happy Wednesday (haha). But I guess it is happy because we have a two-hour early dismissal and only two more days of school after today. Honestly, all I want anymore is sleep.
And so, for some confessions:

• Yesterday morning, I was running a few minutes late. I started my car, went back inside to say goodbye to my puppy, and walked out the door. I drove for about a minute when I realized I'd forgotten the flash drive I needed. I decided to turn around, and when I walked in the door, I noticed my backpack, basketball bag, and lunch box sitting in my kitchen... how did I not realize I was missing all of that?
• I haven't been to bed before 11:30 or 12 for the past two weeks and I think I might be on the verge of a breakdown... (just kidding, maybe)
• I finally turned in my application for the Costa Rica trip last night and I am freaking out. I have to wait until April 1 to find out if I got it and I think I might go crazy before then. But at least the application is done - I'm exhausted from coming in early every morning to work on the essay and application video (both all in Spanish).
• As I was watching Gossip Girl last night instead of doing something productive, I decided to do a glitter party nail while my puppy was sleeping on me; she was sleeping really deeply so I didn't really think anything was wrong with painting them right in front of her face. But then, all of a sudden, she jerked awake... now puppy has glitter OPI all over her face. At least it's pretty.
• I'm pretty sure I have a disease or disorder or something that makes me feel like I have to procrastinate. I've heard people say that when people are smart they procrastinate in order to challenge themselves... I don't know if that's what I'm doing, it probably is. But for whatever unknown reason, no matter how excited I am about the thing I'm doing, I will put it off for as long as possible - hence my new 12:00 bedtime.
• My one year anniversary with my boyfriend was Monday; we said we weren't doing a big date until later so I took that to mean no gifts yet either. He surprised me with really pretty rings and earrings... but his gift hasn't even come in yet. And I feel like a bad girlfriend because I don't know if I got him enough, but I've been broke since Christmas and can barely afford to buy gas. (I asked my parents to buy me a tank of gas for my birthday on the 20th). Is it bad to tell him I can't afford to do much and will do more for his birthday in March?
• And with that I'm going to try and sleep sitting up. Happy Hump Day everyone.

Currently

READING  Zero Day by David Baldacci. I was bored the other day and went through my dad's e-book collection on our network at home and thought I'd go for something different and try this. I'm actually pretty hooked. But, I had to take a break to review River of Stars and read the Scarlet Letter for English.
SIX HUNDRED PAGES
WRITING An essay for my Costa Rica application - or at least trying to write it. I'm suffering from major writer's block; not sure if it's a good sign or a bad sign if I'm having more trouble with what to write rather than writing the two pages is Spanish...
LISTENING to country music all the time
THINKING too much about everything; especially my Costa Rica app. If there is something to overthink, you can guarantee I am overthinking it.
SMELLING my coffee; mom got some new creamer and I'm not sure what kind it is, but it's good.
WISHING for summer, or even spring break, or just a really long break from school.
HOPING I will somehow get better at making decisions
WEARING blue cardigan, my favorite jeans, rose gold-ish watch, pearls, and my authentic Texas cowboy boots (first day in forever that I haven't worn my Fryes, I'm completely addicted to them.
LOVING my Frye boots, and yoga pants; it's a little ridiculous how often I wear both of those (but usally not together thank god - only did that once, and I had an excuse because I was sick... ha)

WANTING more nail polish, new bathing suits, and more pretty shirts (I don't need any of these at all but I really, really want to go shopping) oh & I want everything on wanelo
 love this color
NEEDING sleep 
FEELING tired
CLICKING hulu - trying to catch up on glee, pretty little liars, and new girl; I'm behind on all of them because of basketball

CURRENTLY idea from here

dogs & puppies; happy and sad

Today is a very happy day after several weeks of being sad.
About a month ago, we had to put our dog down to sleep. This dog was pretty much the perfect dog, and I'm still 99.99% sure there will never be another dog as perfect as him. It was a really hard decision for all of us, but he was 14 and suddenly he couldn't walk anymore. As happy as he still seemed, we knew he was in a lot of pain and decided as a family that it was the right thing to do. I know there are much worse things out there that can happen, but losing a dog you've had since you were two and who you're used to having around all the time hurts.
It still hurts sometimes after a month when you come home, already in a bad mood, and there's no one home. You just want to someone to hug who won't talk back to you; someone who's just there.

While we were all trying to get used to our quiet house (the first time ever in my life I've not had a dog; and the first Christmas), we tried to convince ourselves that it would be better to wait a little while before we got a puppy - we'd almost convinced ourselves to wait until spring break. But then...

It was the same day my mom had gone to pick up Levi's ashes from the vet. My parents were waiting for my brother at basketball practice and decided to go by the pet store (the same one we got Levi from) to kill time.

There was a little Springer Spaniel puppy who'd just arrived that day - the first one they had in two years. My parents played with it and fell in love, but decided it was too expensive and it wasn't the right time.

But, they kept thinking about it. Kept wondering if it was a sign from Levi that it happened on that same day. When they went back a few days later, the puppy was still there. They started to consider it a little more seriously.

And finally, this weekend, we decided that on Saturday we were going to go pick her up and bring her home.

We got there, and were told that she couldn't go home for four days because she was sick; we were heartbroken.

But, we waited, and went by to see her yesterday and decided it was time to buy her. SO I'M GETTING A PUPPY TODAY!!



 
we're all praying that this was the right decision after losing Levi so recently; but we just couldn't handle not having a dog anymore. And she's so sweet and soft and it was just too weird a coincidence to ignore - so here we are. PUPPY :)

Midweek Confessions

There are so many things I could, and should, be doing right now... but I miss blogging, and midweek confessions. And, it's my first official day of study hall so why not use it for something completely unproductive :)

• I have to read & review a 600 page book by the 25th. I'm on page 50. I'll probably finish reading it on the 24th around midnight if I'm ahead of things. If not, I'll finish it on the 25th around midnight. This literally happens every month. Why do I never learn?
• Instead of working on this book review during our hour-long bus ride yesterday, I did some online shopping with my iPhone (which I did finally get a couple weeks before Christmas; just realized I never blogged about it. I'm in love.)
• But I did find some cute prom dress ideas, and cute ring ideas since that's what my mom promised for my 17th birthday next month.

  I'm in love with this color all of a sudden... and this watch, even though I just got a watch for Christmas.
 and I LOVE LOVE LOVE this dress but I'm just afraid it looks too much like a wedding/senior-white prom dress. thoughts?
 And last, I love this ring... and it's my birthstone - amethyst, but it's green and I've never heard of it before. But, I'm afraid it would be painful. Anyone have a ring like this? Does it hurt to wear?

• Maybe back to confessions now?
• I got a pair of Frye boots for Christmas and I am completely 100% in love with them - so much so that except for athletic outfits, and maybe 2 normal outfits since Christmas, I've worn them every.single.day. literally. People probably think I have no other shoes, which is completely untrue since I am the queen of boot "investments" but I feel like I'm cheating on my Fryes when I wear anything else.
• I really don't sleep anymore. I get in bed, and spend at least half an hour on my phone before I can even consider sleeping. Then, in the morning, I have to sleep in way more than necessary which means I've gotten my morning routine down to about 20 mins, 30 if I shower. But that's good right?
• I absolutely hate people in the morning - it's getting bad but I can't help it. If you want to avoid me being a complete bitch, Don't talk to me, don't cut me off in the parking lot (that happened today, even though I had my turn signal on and was in the process of backing into a spot.), and God forbid that you drive slow in front of me. If you drive under the speed limit except in snow, hurricane rain, or excessive fog, I hate you. no exceptions.
• I always used to tell myself I'd be a more patient driver than my mother because she drove me crazy when she'd yell at other drivers, but I'm getting more & more like her every single day.
• I can hear the rain in this classroom and it's making me sleepy.
• I'm so focused on this blog post people might actually think I'm doing school work - ha
• And speaking of that, I really need to start working on my Costa Rica app - I'M SO EXCITED!!

Back to Blogging?

It feels like forever since I've last blogged, and I guess it's partially by choice. I just haven't been able to think of anything worthwhile to write, and honestly haven't had the motivation either. That's pretty much been the theme of this school year. I've lost my motivation and I don't know how to get it back. I mean, it comes in little bursts but it goes away so fast that I can't be sure it was ever actually there.
Everyone says junior year is the hardest year of high school, so how am I making A's while honestly not even trying (or cheating, I swear). I think it's something about that that's turned me off to school this year and really gotten me unmotivated; it feels like there's no point.
I'm registering for my SENIOR YEAR tomorrow and hopefully next year will be better. As undecided as I am about college and my future, I'm ready to get the decision out of the way so I can stop worrying about it.
One thing I think I'm pretty sure about is Spanish - I kind of hate the class right now (we're doing skits and I lose points if I don't bring in a prop that makes me look like Beast from Beauty and the Beast; how is this related?), but I love the language. And, because of my score on the National Spanish Exam I was invited to apply to go to Costa Rica for free this summer. Only 12 are chosen in the country, but it's still incredible to think I have the chance. I'm really hoping that will help motivate me.
And a few other things that are motivating me:
My aunt, cousin, and her absolutely adorable baby (toddler, but still baby to me) are coming this weekend.
  Just look at him, I swear he's the cutest kid ever
I'm also going to see Miranda Lambert and Dierks Bentley this weekend with my best friend and our boyfriends.
And, for spring break, my best friend and I are going to the beach. And it's much needed. I'm having beach withdrawals; I need free time and mostly a tan. Oh, and shopping.
And hopefully this summer means Costa Rica. (fingers crossed and lots of prayers)
 

Maybe a version of New Years Resolutions to come soon... maybe

Last Minute Concerts

I've been pretty disappointed for a while now since I realized that I missed my chance to buy Eric Church tickets with good seats; I figured it wasn't worth it to go if I had bad seats so I just gave up. But... the day before the concert, Wednesday, I jokingly tweeted a friend who was going to take me with her and she replied that one of her friends was actually selling his tickets, and they were great seats! I couldn't believe how lucky I was.  So last night, two days after thinking I wasn't going to be at the concert, my boyfriend and I were seeing Kip Moore, Justin Moore, and Eric Church, and in close seats too!

 My boyfriend and I (:

 

I think it's a good sign when you're close enough that he actually shows up in pictures... and notice the beer. Not mine, but I'm pretty sure everyone over 21 was drunk. Oh, and someone did leave a giant puddle of beer under my seat, before the concert even started...

 

Justin Moore singing... I LOVE LOVE LOVE him; I saw him with Blake Shelton, too and I'd definitely see him again.  For his song "If Heaven Wasn't So Far Away" he got everyone to stand up and turn the flashlight app on their phones on and he dedicated it to his grandpa whom he wrote the song for.  It was really beautiful in there (I wanted a picture but my phone was on the verge of dying all night, so my boyfriend got one on his phone)

And can I just ask why all guys can't wear jeans like Justin Moore's? They were tight, like I think his can of dip must be permanently imprinted in his butt tight.

And his accent, oh my.

I just love him.

And of course, Eric Church, who is surprisingly tall. And not once did he take off his sunglasses. It was a great show, and he has a lot of good songs (but we did leave before he encored since we were tired, and we got in the car and realized he didn't sing "Springsteen" or "Drink a Little Drink, Smoke a Little Smoke" so he must've done those at the very end)

 

But one of the best things about our seats was how close we were to the floor - which means people watching.  You can't really read it, but this guy's shirt said "Back to back World War Champs," and there was no shortage of American flag button-downs. The little things like that are why I love country concerts, oh and all the cowboy boots we saw <3 (of course I wore mine, with shorts, what else)

 All in all, it was a great night. And I think that finding out so last minute made it even better. 

But, one of the best parts of my night was finding out that Miranda Lambert and Dierks Bentley will be here in January. I LOVE them both and I can promise I will be attending that concert.

Currently

reading blogs, Great Gatsby, mostly wishing I had more time to read. But, I did reserve the new JK Rowling book at the library yesterday, yay yay yay!
writing a bunch of weird projects for online health.
listening country music, what else?  I'm still not sure what Pandora station I've been listening to for the past few days, but whatever it is, it's right on point.
thinking about college; why is it all anyone ever talks about?
smelling fall smells... mmmmmm
wishing we could just randomly get a few weeks off of school to relax...
hoping my school work will decide to do itself this week...
wearing my long sleeve tee, what else do you wear on a rainy day?  and, I've noticed that leggings are becoming my pants of choice more and more frequently...
loving my boyfriend :), and the new seasons of New Girl and Glee; they're both amazing this year.
wanting pumpkin ice cream and taco bell, all the time
needing more sleeeep and more cuddle time
feeling tired but excited because it's a short week for me this week; I get to miss Friday and next monday for my cousin's wedding, I'M SO EXCITED!!!
clicking online shopping... anyone know a really good website for expensive looking boots that aren't actually that expensive?